Ogden

So, I have been experiencing some weird feelings towards Ogden as of late. I had to drive up there yesterday (Friday) for a rather annoying situation I got myself into. Over a year ago a friend of mine asked me to accompany her for her senior recital. I saw the music and thought I could play it, so I agreed. We practiced. I practiced. And we practiced some more. But, she did not pass her recital preview and therefore was not allowed to do her recital. A year later, we are trying again. Friday was the preview. I have been kind of practicing the music, but not as much as I should. Nevertheless. It has has been a most frustrating experience. I should have told her no this time. I am not living in Ogden this summer, so I must travel almost 2 hours to get there and then 2 hours to get home. The time is a problem (since I'm trying to work as much as possible to pay off some debts), but it's not nearly as big a problem as having enough gas to make it there and back. I tell you what...those gas prices really make a difference when you have to travel at least 45 miles to get to the closest doctor, walmart, or other necesary places. Thankfully the town I live in has a small grocery store and gas station, but sometimes it's not enough. Anyways. So, I had to drive up to Ogden on Friday feeling the stress of the financial burden it was placing on me. I had to give up my day working on for this trip. Not that I love my job, but any extra hour is an hour's worth of pay I desperately need. I left town and before I left the town, I got pulled over. I have NEVER been pulled over myself. I have been in cars that have been pulled over, but I was never the driver. Yesterday was bad. I was in a hurry and couldn't stand going 20mph. So, I suppose I was at 30mph when the cop clocked me. Grr. Thankfully he only gave me a warning since it was my first offense. But, still. It is frustrating that that is now on my record. Anyways. So, I left for Ogden feeling irritated, then angry and now I was late and needed to hurry even more. To be honest, I still sped. I didn't speed as much as I usually do (there's a road that I like to drive on that is easy to hit 90mph without thinking too hard on it), but I still let my lead foot take over. Then I got to the Browning Center to practice and the room we needed was in use. Anyways. We practiced as an ensemble and had a poor run-through. I have practiced the music to the point that I can play it, but somehow I can never do it right when I'm with the ensemble. It's beyond frustrating, especially when I have a friend of mine that I feel very judged by. I won't even go into that right now. That's a whole 'nother blog. Anyways. So, after that I had a few hours to burn, so I went to go see a movie. I saw Price Caspian. That was a rather good movie. There were some bad editing and filming problems, but overall, I really liked it. It helped calm my anger down a bit, but I was still feeling on edge about everything. Then, as I started heading towards Harrison, I felt rather odd. I knew I was in Ogden and that I had been there before, but I felt so detached from it. I have spent more than half of my past 5 years there. I usually love Ogden, but this time I almost want to say...I hated it. I don't know why. Maybe it was just one of those days. I just don't know. Anyways. I got myself a Pita and went to go practice some more. I warmed up on the piano that was to be used (oh...I just remembered, I haven't said why I had to stick around....this was also the day of the preivew for the second try at the recital for this friend). My left hand just wouldn't work for me. I tried hannon exercises and scales and nothing worked. It was a miracle that I could play at all to be honest. Anyways. So, as I'm warming up, one of the people on the committee for this preview walked in. It was my band director-Dr. Root. Before saying anything else to me, he told me that I had a cd of his daughter's that he was supposed to ask me about. He didn't even say hello. That man never ceases to frustrate me with his lack of treating me like a person. So, I went to sit down when it was time to start (since I was not involved with the first number) and another committee member walked in. Bettie-Jo. She is quickly becomming someone I admire (I can't believe I said that!). Well, maybe not admire, but look up to or something like that. Anyways, she was the only one that said hello to me that day. It's so frustrating! I just about went up to Dr. Root and told him that I would never be coming back. And to be honest, it almost felt like I wouldn't be. I felt so weird! So...to make a long story short (er)...she passed the preview and now we have to practice even more before her recital in 2 weeks. I need to work. I can't afford the gas. I don't have the time. And I don't enjoy going to Ogden at the moment. Ahh! I have a feeling that some changes might be coming in the near future. I sure hope so.