Slim Fast

Last week I decided to donate plasma (first time). My carpool buddy does it regularly and he talked me into it. During the process of making sure I could donate I had to step on a scale and be reminded how not light I am. When my 'interviewer/medical person' told me my weight I just about cried. I was one pound short of 260.
That's crazy!!!!!
I have been piling on the weight daily. I made a post on Facebook to vent my disgust with myself. One of my friends responded and got me convinced to give up soda. So, as of today I have made it a week without soda. That's a big deal! Especially with the fact that I work where there are 2 soda fountains that I have unlimited access to.
I was also apparently bloated due to pms, but as of tonight I was at 153. So, whether it was bloating, cutting out soda, differences in scales or some of all, I have dropped some weight since last Friday. Thank heavens!
Thursday night in my pathology class we discussed diabetes. Last week we also had a class discussion on healthy lifestyles and the current obesity crisis. Needless to say, I've been outright depressed. I am overweight and definitely obese. My body is starting to breakdown from it. My legs swell every night to the point of pain. My knees hurt. My feet and ankles hurt and my back hurts.
I've had enough for real this time. I talked to my mom today venting my frustrations. She seemed to think it was OK that I'm gaining weight. I love my mother, but I fear that she has gotten to the point that she has made enough excuses and justified everything so much that she almsot thinks that I should be obese. When I told her I can tell I'm on the fast track to becoming diabetic, she didn't sound sad or disappointed.
THIS MAKES ME SAD.
Oh how it makes me sad!
It also makes me more determined than ever to make some necessary changes.
I may not have the support of my immediate family (pretty certain I'm alone when it comes to them right now...my dad's health is failing, my brother doesn't really communicate with me and my mom has so many nightmares to deal with I feel guilty even texting her), but I don't need them for this. If I'm ever going to have a family of my own I want to be better than this. I want to be a hiking, bike-riding, swimming, running, yoga and Pilates loving health nut (possibly vegetarian).
After my pathology class I vented again my frustrations with my weight. A dear friend from Ogden told me of her friend that does health coaching. I contacted her and might possibly start that program. I'm not sure yet. It involves pre-packaged foods. It can't be a permanent solution as I want to get to eating fresh meals that are free of processed gunk. I want real food, from the earth. But, until I can get to that point, this program may be worth using to get down to my ideal weight. According to my height I should be at about 160 to have a healthy BMI. That means I have about 100 pounds to lose.
Yikes!!!
Since I couldn't afford to plop down almost $100 for my first round of food for the program I talked to that lady about, I decided to hold off for now until I can afford it. But, maybe this Friday (payday) I will do it. As I was feeling that I needed to do something immediately about my commitment to get started, I went to Walmart. I knew that they had a kit from Nutrisystem which is very similar to the program I'm thinking about doing. I found it and started looking at it. I was not impressed. I got to looking down the aisle and saw the countless Slim Fast products. I got to looking and came to the conclusion it was a good place to start. So, I purchased enough shakes and bars to last about 5 (possibly 7, I'm not sure honestly) days. My goal is just to make it 5 days. If I can do this for 5 days it will hopefully kickstart my efforts to lose weight and who knows...maybe I'll just stick with it.
Today was my first day. I had my massage clinic shift and surprisingly enough, I survived just fine. I had a shake for breakfast, a meal bar for lunch and 2 snack bars and a bag of their snack cracker things, then I had a club salad from Subway (thank you perks from work...free food!). I'm a little hungry right now, but if I could bring myself to drink more water I'd probably be just fine. Anyways.
Tonight I weighed 253.
That's my starting weight. When I get to Friday I'll check where I'm at. I'll also decide then what I'm going to do. I saw a video on YouTube of a girl that was on her way to doing the Slim Fast diet for a full year. I don't know if I can do that, but I have started and I can't wait to see where this path takes me.
I still want to learn to cook and prepare healthy meals on my own. But, that won't be happening anytime soon. Maybe after I graduate. Anywho.
Friday.
I can't wait to see where I get to.
:)