Countdown

One of my classmates put up a countdown timer on our Facebook group page.
There are 83 days left until graduation.
That is less than 3 months.
October 1st is just 4 days away.
There is about (my math may be off...I had 4 hours of sleep last night) 92 days until the last day of this year.

I
Am
FREAKING
OUT!

I have never felt this much anxiety before.
I'm anxious about being able to afford the national certification exam.
I'm anxious about PASSING the exam.
I'm anxious about what I'm going to do AFTER the exam.
I'm anxious about HOW I'm going to do what I do after the exam once I actually decide.

Those are my more long-term anxieties.
My short-term anxieties include getting offered a new job today, dealing with EXTREMELY negative people in my class (including myself) and trying to figure out all the long-term anxieties.

I don't know how I'm going to survive this.

Yes, it is just 3 months away and all of this will just be a memory, but this is a HUGE deal.
I'm still struggling with actually wanting to be a massage therapist. But, I have no choice. This will be my career for awhile. When I finish school and pass my exams I will be a licensed massage therapist.
I have a bachelor's degree and somehow I'm more anxious about saying I'm a LMT.
Anyways.
I'm grateful for countdowns.
They keep me sane.
BUT
The countdowns remind me just how unprepared and undecided I really am.

Like I said...

FREAKING OUT!!!!!!!!!!!